No One is Coming

Today I would like to simply and quickly share one of my favorite thoughts on self-improvement.

This short thought comes from Nathaniel Branden’s book The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem and it simply goes like this:

“No one is coming”.

Short. But it has been a powerful and sobering reminder for me.

Because yes, you can look for the next big thing that will fix you.

Read more blog articles. Read more personal development books. Look for people to help you.

And yes, some articles, books, products or people will give you support and insights that resonate deeply with you and that you can put into practice.

But in the end, if you are an adult then no one is coming. No one is coming to save you. You have to take responsibility for your own life and what happens in it.

Other things and people can certainly aid you quite a bit. But you are responsible.

You can go around blaming society or some people for your problems in your social life. Or finances. Or health. You can always find scapegoats to judge to feel better about yourself. You can look for people that will “fix you”.

You can do this for the rest of your life if you like. It won’t change much.

Whatever has to be done, it’s you who have to take responsibility and do it.

Yeah, things might always not go your way. You’ll fall and stumble and you will probably have bad luck from time to time.

But you still have to focus on yourself and on doing what you can do with what you have in whatever situation that may arise in your world.

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About the Author

Henrik Edberg is the creator of the Positivity Blog and has written weekly articles here since 2006. He has a bachelor’s degree in journalism from the University of Gothenburg and has been featured on Lifehacker, HuffPost and Paulo Coelho’s blog. Click here to learn more…

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Melinda

    I enjoyed reading this Henrik!

    Thank you for posting.

  • This is my first visit to your website. It will not be my last.

  • “No one is coming to save you. You have to take responsibility for your own life” Thanks for your sharing!

  • No one seems to be coming to my blog. Well, not on one, but the numbers have been stagnant for over a year. Therefore I’m intentionally going to try less and focus on my family.

  • Hi Henrik,

    I haven’t been here in a while and decided to stop by and see how you are doing – happy to see you are still blogging and running a great website :)

    No one is coming lol … Boy, when I first started making the transition from day job to self-sufficient location-independent entrepreneur with no parents, employer, or other institution to “save me” … it was scary. Now though I would not trade the freedom of absolute personal responsibility for anything.

    Thanks for a fun post :)

    cheers,
    Erika

  • Akansha

    Such a liberating and, at the same moment, a fearful thought this is. All we mostly want at the time of an adversity is a help to pull us out off the problems. Yet we ought to remind us that no one except ourselves are the one to free ourselves from the chains of hard times.

    Thanks for sharing such a powerful thought, Henrik! :-)

  • Paula

    It’s nice to think that someone will save you but the only person that can save you is yourself…..I’m a late learner but i’m teaching my 9 year old to take responsibility for there self s a very good tool to have.

    Thank you for your e-mails, there very inspiring.

  • Lydia

    What a great reminder! We really do have the power to make our lives exactly as we want them or to make excuses for why they are not the way we want them to be…either way, no one is coming.

    Thanks!

  • I’m so glad someone (you) published an article pointing out that we all need to take responsibility for ourselves. It’s too easy to blame outside influences such as our parents, the economy, the past, etc. for why we are unhappy or don’t have the life we want. It takes courage and commitment to take control and change one’s life. It also takes a lot of patience! I changed my life circumstances. The positive change was noticeable and exhilarating from day one that I started it , but it took five years of working toward my goal of a happier and better life for myself and my children to improve by small increments month by month. Of course, the process of taking responsibility never ends, either. We are responsible for so much more than ourselves! The planet, our children, those less fortunate…

  • Danette

    The simplicity is BEAUTIFUL! Thank you for sharing such a powerful bullet of inspiration!!! Stop looking outside of yourself, and get on with it… “No one is coming”. I love it!!

  • Yes at the end of the day we are solely responsible for what happens/doesn’t happen in our personal lives, no one else.
    Whatever you want to see in the world, it is up to you to change it and manifest it, nobody can manifest your dreams for you. Let’s be more accountable and responsible towards our dreams.
    Thanks for such a concise and straight to the point piece of work.