Comments on: Why you should not compare yourself to others

By: Tess

Tess — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 06:45:29 +0000

This uplifts me. I am pretty manic depressive as it is. And I have a terrible case of comparing myself to others, casued more so from low confuidence, more so than jealousy. Everyone around me who knows this thinks I am crazy because people around me think I have this great life, ive traveled a lot, experienced a lot….but no matter what people say, I always compare myself to other people around me who are doing the things I want to do as a career, but only they are actually making it their profession…while I sit here and do the same hobbies, trying to make it a profession, but im sitting here in my room always questioning what they are doing better? It makes me sick to know that I do this and I wish someone could take my brain and program it to NOT do this. I try to read things like this daily on the internet to lift my spirits, othewrwise I wallow in deep depression. Thank you for cheering me up for the day. I need to realize that I dont need a million people kissing my ass, or loving how i look or what I do…I just need to love myself and who I am first…then the rest will fall into place.

By: macro

macro — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 03:10:09 +0000

Of course the article is totally correct.. Im a person who has the ‘comparing illness’ within me severely. that is why i found some help from internet, and I found this.. I always think that I dont have a better identity, and I always think that people around me have lot of better things than me… then I try to achieve everything that they got.. this makes me so tired and all the time I feels like I am a looser.. No one tells me that Im a looser and according to the social surrounding here I have achieve something considerable too.. but the problem is I always want to compare myself with the people who are different(having different things) than me…
may be I should think that everyone is not the same and different people have different things.. if everyone have everything,then ohh god, the world will be a boring place… yes! I have that idea , but when I see another person it changes… ! anyway I better try out this article, I hope it will help me…

By: Helen

Helen — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 21:32:48 +0000

Henrik,
Try the Sedona Method (book or CDs) that are all about “releasing” or what you and Tolle call “surrender”.
Helen

By: marc

marc — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 01:04:06 +0000

thanks

By: Rodmaninov

Rodmaninov — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 11:26:24 +0000

I come from very judgemental parents, who have gone through life harshly ‘qualifying’ everyone and everything around them. As a child, it made me do the same . . . and their negative voices became lodged in my mind . . . finally focused on myself. I don’t try and be like anyone, but I do hear what I think they might be saying in disapproval . . . I know that language all too well. This article and the responses afterward helped me because it reinforced my gut feeling that I’ve got a unique and valuable thing to contribute to this world, and even if it’s rejected, I know I’ve put it out there for better or for worse. I’m overcoming fear while trying to be positive and learn a more healthy internal language . . . Thanks for the positive thoughts here, keep up the good work !!

By: Pavla

Pavla — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 19:12:16 +0000

Cos just think about it , if i try to get approval with every single person I meet, I will go MAD…so it is not worth it!

By: Pavla

Pavla — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 19:10:23 +0000

Hey, great article, have been struggling this for a while and actually realised that it works when I accept my feelings and express myself as I want to (as long as it is not aggressive of course), it is sooooo liberating….so i no longer try to keep a smily face all the time if i dont feel like it and it feels so well internally, unbelievable…integrity is the key i think..the less i pretend or try to fit someone else’s ideal or even copy their feelings and behaviour (which i do sometimes, as i am quite sensitive), the more right it feels….I have read a book recently. it is called Fu*k it..and it summarises Buddhist approach in understandable way for westerners

By: 9 Mistakes That Can Kill Your Personal Growth | Set your goals - Have big dreams

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 05:55:39 +0000

[...] you get stuck here itÂ´s probably because you need validation from others. Take a look at Why you should not compare yourself to others for some thoughts and practical tips for overcoming or at least reducing this very common [...]

By: a needed someone

a needed someone — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 03:41:42 +0000

Thanks that is just what I needed to hear today. seriously.

By: satbir

satbir — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 08:13:24 +0000

I think it has a lot to do with the childhood. If someone is constantly compared as a child with others especially someone better. The feeling of inferiority creep in and we constantly try to compare ourselves even as adults. We just need to unlearn that behavior and get grip of new positive thinking pattern. Anyway very nice post.